You don’t owe your past self anything you do today
I’m coming to you today as a girl who used to hold on to the past way way longer than I should.I could relive something that happened months ago in my head a couple of times.Wishing I had done this and that .Regretting that I hadn’t done this or the other .
Let’s not get started on how my fears kept me in the future.Let me explain, I would start on a project right? Then halfway into it, I start the self destructive process of “Why am I doing this anyway?”, “What if I work as hard as I need to and It doesn’t work out anyway?”
Slowly over the course of life, it crippled me.I became the biggest procrastinator I know. I became the girl who doesn’t go through with plans fully because I was afraid of the imminent failure waiting on the other side. When in fact, I haven’t reached the other side and known what the outcome would be.
The worse part was when I focused on the present and seen all I had failed to accomplish, get sad and remember how in the past when I had the chance of working on making today better, I didn’t. Then almost simultaneously thinking of the impending doom that is my future. That’s when I realised how bad and quickly my mental health started declining. The seasonal depression would kick in. That was the first time I actually realised I needed therapy.
I realised I wasn’t broken, a failure or simply doomed.I was focusing on the wrong things.This I what I learnt from my therapist
1.You need to forgive yourself of past mistakes
You can’t go back in time ,You can’t undo what you did . The only thing you can do is forgive yourself.Notice what you can learn from said past and be intentional about breaking any negative patterns you have .Thats what you can do better.
2. Focus on now.
I dont mean 10 mins from now .I mean this very moment.What can you do right now and do it well.If I start on my blog, my business is not to start panicking on how it might not get any views or how I might not be a success. my focus is , am I sharing what I care about? Am I setting aside 10 minutes to write the post.Then now I can start thinking of the pictures to take for the post.One problem at a time.
3.Dont overwhelm yourself .
Don’t sit down and think of the 10,000 things you have to do. One, that’s just an anxious mess waiting to happen. Put what you need to do in a list. Then split it into priorities and see what is urgent then do that first.
ONE STEP AT A TIME
Look I’m not here to tell you that
Don’t panic about a tomorrow you’re not even assured of. You have now though and you are worthy of this day and moment and tomorrow really does get better.